I get asked that question quite often. Most of the time, it's people I don't even know when they see my license plate, MEGLTH. Either that, or people ask me because of my email address, megiloth@megiloth.com or megiloth@comcast.net. I have told this tale so many times, I have decided to archive it for the ages and send people here so they can read it for themselves. Perhaps you will be enlightened, or perhaps you just shake your head and say, "What a dumb story". But at least you'll think twice the next time you ask someone about their nickname, and they tell you up front, "It's an inside joke and you won't understand." If you really must learn the ambiguous genesis of this polysyllabic word, then follow me on an etymological journey unsurpassed by even Malliwi Rapesheake himself. Strap yourself in and enjoy the ride. Remember to keep your arms inside the car at all times.
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Summer 1992 - I was still in the Marine Corps, and while on leave, I attended the annual Cornerstone Festival in Bushnell, Illinois with JJ and Shane. Our first day in this tiny farm town, we were chased away by massive storms and tornados, so we didn't get to do any shopping at the Exhibition Hall. This was the huge tent where bands and record labels hung out and hawked their goods. Lots of new releases come out during the festival, so it's always nice to hit it up the first thing. We arrived at the fairgrounds, but with swirling black clouds of death above us, we were compelled to cruise back down the dirt road with JJ at the helm. We spent the next few hours running for our lives, and I have this all documented on videotape with my trusty 150 lb VHS camcorder, so I can back up this story. Later that night we returned to the fairgrounds and subsequently checked out the Exhibition Hall. While there, we picked up the new Mortification release entitled, "Scrolls of the Megilloth". My friends weren't the outdoors type, but since I went with them, I also stayed at a semi-local hotel. On the way back to the hotel from the fairgrounds that night, we were listening to the tape in the car and thoroughly enjoying it...except for JJ, who didn't like it and thought it was too fast. Oh well, his taste in music sucks anyways. At the time, he was into Soundgarden and Pearl Jam, if that tells you anything. The title track had just completed ripping our eardrums out, when we pulled into the nearest Burger King drive-thru to get some sustenance. The kindly cashier gave us our drinks & burgers, and Shane, who was riding shotgun, grabbed the straws and growled, "Straws of the Megillo-o-o-o-th". If you've heard this song, he growled it just like the song. I was in the backseat and just started cracking up. The cosmic tumblers clicked into place, and the timing was just right. For whatever reason, I found this extremely funny, and couldn't stop laughing until we got back to the hotel maybe thirty minutes later. Once we were back in the hotel room, I was finally OK. Everything was calm. My sides and cheeks hurt, but I was none worse for wear...until Shane roared out, "Straws of the Megilloth!!!!". Round two commenced, and again, I began a long streak of extreme laughter. This happened throughout the night and the next morning when I woke up.
Before leaving for Cornerstone, I ordered a 1200 baud modem for my Commodore 128D, and by the time I got back, it had arrived. This was back in the days before people surfed the net as a normal routine, and most computer users dialed up local Bulletin Board Systems; BBS for short. Just like any other online service, ISP, shell account, etc, you need a User Name and Password. With the above incident still fresh in my cerebral housing group, I signed on as: Megilloth. Since I was only on leave for a couple weeks, it was time for me to go back to playing Marine for another year in Okinawa, Japan.
1993 - A year later in the summer, I completed my four years of Active Duty in the Marine Corps and was for all intents and purposes, I was a civilian again. When I returned back home, one of the first things I did was sign on to more BBS's, and create all sorts of new Megilloth accounts. Most boards at the time were 80 column ANSI, and ran on IBM (or compatible) PC's. I used a Commodore 128D, but had to dial in using a Commodore 64 terminal emulator. Unfortunately, most IBM boards used graphics that didn't translate well to the Commodore format. Except for a few IBM boards, I stuck mainly to the handful of Commodore based BBS's in the Kansas City area such as Temple of Doom, KBPD, The Pulpit, The BBQ Pit, and Northern Lights. Everyone on these BBS's knew me as Megilloth. I also perused another Commodore board, The Grapevine BBS operated by Jack Baker, but their ilk made me want to vomit my soul upon them. It was the Commodore BBS that no one visited and we made fun of. Grape-a-roonie this you crippled bastard!
1996 - I decided to get personalized plates. Not surprisingly, MEGLTH was not taken (Missouri plates have six characters). That's when I started to get the goofy questions. Working at the local Pizza Hut, fellow employees, customers, and complete strangers would ask me what my license plate says. At this point, I would recount the story, and they still were lost. Oh well.
1997 - I finally got internet access. While talking to the support guy on the other end of the phone line, he asked me what User ID I would like to use. Since I've used Megilloth for almost the past four years, that's what I told him. He asked me how to spell it, so I spelled it out. M-E-G-I-L-L-O-T-H. Uh oh...no can do. Their system only allowed 8 characters, I had dropped an 'L' in the name.
Since that time, I have always been "megiloth" at whatever ISP I've used, and so just recently when I acquired my domain name, megiloth.com just seemed like a natural thing.
I know what you're thinking..."That's fine, but what IS a Megilloth?". Fair enough. Megilloth is an Old Testament term meaning five scrolls. These books include Ruth, Song of Solomon, Esther, Lamentations, and Ecclesiastes. These writings were read at Jewish holidays.
Now, how many of you really wished that you've never asked me that question? That's what I thought. So what does any of this have to do with anything? Absolutely nothing. But what if the weather had been sunny that day? What if we never went to Burger King? What if the Aussie band never existed? What if we camped out instead of staying in town? Chances are that I would likely have a lame alias like "KCMosher", "Mad Buffalo", "Frothing Emu", "Spamchunk" or "Demon Buster".
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